Back Porch Break

Summer’s Song

June 13, 2019 by Nancy 6 Comments

Has anyone else noticed that the birds seem to be singing more enthusiastically this summer than ever before? I don’t know if it’s because I’ve slowed down enough to truly hear them, or if they’ve added more songs to their repertoires. I just know they seem to be sounding a symphony of song this summer—especially at dawn’s early light when they all crescendo, “It’s morning! Time to get up!”

A computer search on bird calls opened up a whole new world of ornithological information to me. According to the Cornell Lab of Ornithology website “All About Birds,” when a bird sings it is telling you what it is and where it is. I’m sorry, but the only bird I can identify in that way would be the one chirping right in front of me from our deck railing. Even then I might not know what it is, but at least I would know where it is!

I blame my lack of an ability to identify birds by their tweets on the fact that I grew up in Tennessee where the official state bird is the Mockingbird. It got its name from, you guessed it, mocking the calls of all other birds! No wonder I’m an epic fail at deciphering bird song.

What I learned from my research, however, is that many people out there in bird land take identifying birds by the songs they sing extremely seriously. The comments on one website reminded me of the old PBS radio program “Car Talk,” where Click and Clack, the Tappet brothers, would ask callers to describe the noises their malfunctioning cars were making and get responses like: gurgle-gurgle-hiss, screeeeech, or clang-clang-clunk.

An actual comment from one birder asking for help in identifying a bird call was: The best I can describe it is like a “twotty twotty twotty twwwEEEEEEEEE….twa twa twa twa.” The “twwwEEEEE” part goes up in pitch, the twa’s are back down in pitch, sort of around where the twotty’s were in the beginning.

OK. Got that? What’s your guess?

I also learned that on birding websites, and even on YouTube, you can click on the name of a bird and listen to its actual song. Listening to bird calls on your computer all afternoon is not only somewhat interesting, it’s also a wonderful way to confuse and bemuse your cat.

Suggestions online for beginning birders on how to identify birds by their songs include: listen and watch, learn from an expert, say the sound to yourself (see above), and pay attention to details like rhythm, pitch, tone and repetition.

I think ornithology would be a wonderful vocation or avocation, but I’m not sure it’s for me. I’ll just continue to enjoy all the melodies I hear and wonder why the winged wonders warble at the same time instead of taking turns like on American Idol. And I’ll never figure out what genre each bird has chosen. Oldies? Praise songs? Reggae? Rhythm and blues? It sure sounds like a mix of all of them.

Whether birds sing to announce their whereabouts or to attract a mate, I’m just glad they sing. When ladies in my assisted living Bible study tell me that they can’t sing, I often quote Psalm 100 and tell them to just, “Make a joyful noise unto the Lord!” The summer songbirds I love to hear seem to be doing just that.

A Sonoran Spring

May 23, 2019 by Nancy 15 Comments

Living in Colorado Springs, a place that just got 8-12” of snow on May 20, I often fantasize about spring. Usually my fantasy is of the rolling green hills of East Tennessee, the azaleas, dogwoods, tulips and irises. But this spring found us in Tucson, AZ, for a granddaughter’s graduation, a Mother’s Day celebration, and a daughter’s 50th birthday party all on one weekend. There I discovered a different kind of spring that I can fantasize about in years to come—a Sonoran desert spring!

On this busy weekend away my husband Jim and I were surprised to discover that we had three hours to ourselves between celebrations. A friend told me about Tohono Chul botanic gardens in north Tucson, so we hopped in our rental car and off we went. I was charmed the minute we got out of the car and I heard the endearing sound of hummingbirds in flight. And why not? Later I learned they have their own garden at Tohono Chul, which translated means “desert corner.”

As with most preserves, this 49-acre oasis in the middle of Tucson’s urban sprawl began in the hearts of people recognizing its beauty and wanting to make it available to generations to come. University of Arizona geologist Richard Wilson and his wife Jean began purchasing property in the area in the late 1960s. According to the brochure, their home at the time was a hacienda-style building which now houses the Tohono Chul Garden Bistro—an inviting spot where I hope to lunch another day.

“At first, we just went out and put down some lime to make a path and marked the names of some plants and bushes, but then it started to snowball,” the Wilsons said. “Snowball” may be an odd choice of words to describe the progress of a desert garden, but grow it did and Tohono Chul Park was formally dedicated on April 19, 1985.

The trails that wind through Tohono Chul are full of enchanting discoveries from the stately saguaro cacti to the smallest desert wildflowers. One unexpected turn of events was that I had sprained my ankle on a walk the day before, so the kind volunteers at the garden offered us a wheelchair. Not only did I quickly grow more empathetic toward friends and relatives I love who must spend their lives in wheelchairs, I realized Jim and I have a lot to learn about navigating with one.

We entertained other visitors with my cries of, “Wait! Back up!” or “No, I want to go this way!” A patient husband is a wonderful gift indeed, but I suspect there was some eye-rolling I didn’t see that elicited the smiles of passersby! My hobbled status gave me a unique perspective on this new kind of spring, however. When I realized how blessed I was to have a husband who made sure I got to see the gardens I wanted to see—and that I never would have noticed that a lizard friend was shedding his skin had I not been closer to his level—the verse from 1 Thessalonians 5:18 came to mind: Be joyful always; pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.

Thankful for family celebrations. Thankful for a caring husband. Thankful my injury was only temporary. Thankful for the walking stick I purchased in the gift shop—made of real Colorado aspen! Thankful for the warm memory of a Sonoran desert spring as I watched the snow fall back home.

(For more information on Tohono Chul, look here.)

Bring on the Pomp and Circumstance

May 7, 2019 by Nancy 18 Comments

Liam's Class in 2014 — Liam’s Class in 2014

A quick tally reveals that since my husband and I have been together we will have attended 22 graduations for our kids and grandkids by the end of this month. And that doesn’t include the sweet kindergarten graduations with cherubic faces grinning under precariously perched construction-paper mortar boards–or all the “moving up” ceremonies to middle school and high school.

Sitting through the list of names from Aker to Zimmerman, and listening to all the speeches about learning from the past and reaching for the stars in the future, were all worth it, however. Even if the auditorium was stifling hot and we were seated behind a large post. Why? Because of the graduates we loved and wanted to celebrate fully!

And yes, we’ll have more pomp in our family this graduation season—under different circumstances! I know it’s true because two graduation invitations are on our refrigerator. Granddaughter Sophia will graduate from Del Norte High School and granddaughter Morgan will graduate from the University of Arizona–a year early! Both girls will be adding all their hopes and dreams to that cumulative pile formed by 2019 graduates everywhere.

I haven’t been asked to give a graduation address since I was in high school, and frankly I hope I never am. I’d have a hard time sticking to the expected “worldly advice” and “it’s all up to you” script. I wouldn’t be able to keep myself from offering Biblical advice that matters—something with substance like: Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight (Proverbs 3:5-6).

Sadly then, in many schools today, the “politically correct police” would drag me from the podium and out the back door of the auditorium. But I might have time to toss over my shoulder a few more words of practical advice I’ve heard or learned—my honorary academic gown flapping with every step, and my honorary mortar board tassel bouncing up and down:

“Don’t worry about what other people think of you, because they don’t think of you that often!”

“Start your day by making your bed and no matter what you’ve accomplished something!”

“Wear sunscreen! Skin cancer happens.”

“Stay in touch with your parents! They’ll always love you.”

“Show up where you’re supposed to be and when you’re supposed to be there!”

“Look for opportunities to help or encourage someone else! Be kind and humble.”

No, I won’t be giving any speeches. But I will be sitting proudly next to my husband taking in all aspects of the celebrations: Graduates hugging one another and high-fiving, cell phones flashing, parents and grandparents beaming in that foolish way we do so well. And why shouldn’t we? Graduations are great milestones worth celebrating on this journey we call life.

Come to the Cross

April 17, 2019 by Nancy 10 Comments

In a sense, the entire Christian life is a series of steps closer and closer to the Cross of Calvary—with each step an arrival. Only as we draw close in prayer and meditation to the truth of what Christ did for us by willingly dying on that cross can we realize the enormity of the gift we have been given. And for many, that journey is a lifelong process.

Yet even from a distance, where we may have stood terrified and huddled together under some tree, we can see the love Christ displayed on the cross that day. Love for His mother as He asked His disciple John to care for her once He was gone. Love for the believing thief on the cross next to Him as He promised, “Today you will be with me in paradise” (Luke 23:43). Love for every man and woman created by His Father throughout history and beyond as He made the ultimate sacrifice for mankind. That means love for you and for me.

What do we see as we draw closer? That Jesus didn’t just pay the price for our sin, rather He took on all the sin of the world so that nobody anywhere would have to suffer eternal consequences for being less than perfect. When John the Baptist first saw Jesus on the shore of the Jordan River he said, “Look, the Lamb of God, who takes away the sin of the world!” (John 1:29). Believe. Come to the cross, and your sin, past, present and future, is gone. Not rationalized or sugar-coated in some way. Gone. As is the guilt of that sin. You are completely forgiven.

One step closer and we see the abject humility of the one who is both the Son of God and the Son of Man. We see His wounds and the blood flowing down. He lowered Himself to the very pit of hell—separation from God—so that we might go higher than we could ever go on our own. And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself and became obedient to death—even death on a cross! (Philippians 2:8)

The Bible promises that if we also humble ourselves in the eyes of the Lord that He will lift us up. Are you there at the foot of the cross? If you haven’t taken that journey, there’s no better time than this Easter. Fall to your knees in humility and worship the One whose resurrection from the dead we celebrate on Easter Sunday! Accept His unconditional forgiveness. You are welcome at the foot of the cross.

Easter Eggstras

April 12, 2019 by Nancy 9 Comments

I embrace and revel in the true meaning of Easter as much as the next redeemed sinner. Soon we’ll be singing “Christ the Lord Is Risen Again,” and lifting our alleluias high to the One who sacrificed all to save us all. But in the days leading up to Easter, I have to confess that I enjoy all the secular sensations of the season, too—what we might think of as the Easter eggstras.

At the top of my list are the bunnies. I’ve loved rabbits since I raised them in junior high and showed them at the county fair. There are a few decorative rabbits tucked here and there around our house all year ‘round, but many more hop out of storage when it’s time to decorate for Easter.

When we were a newly blended family thirty plus years ago, I found a family of rabbits in a catalog with a mom, a dad, two boys and two girls—just like us at that time! They’ve taken up residence in our dining room every Easter since—with only one bunny ear broken and glued back in place. Fat rabbits, skinny rabbits, a joyous Rosenthal rabbit purchased in Germany that once adorned the christening cakes of both my boys as infants, bunny cakes with jelly bean bowties—all bring me joy each year.

And then there are the eggs! We actually have an egg tree which takes about as much time to decorate as a Christmas tree, and a collection of alabaster eggs gathered from many different places on long ago travels. I’ve loved dying Easter eggs with children and grandchildren through the years. Last year I died them all yellow so each person at Easter dinner could create an Easter emoji! Early morning Easter egg hunts with baskets full of colored eggs and day-after-egg-salad are also eggstras I’ve enjoyed in years past.

What else? Little girls in new Easter dresses and bonnets and dapper little boys in bowties and Sunday shoes. A spiral-cut ham with all the trimmings for Easter dinner—all these things create memories that grow more precious as time goes by.

I know the Lord wants us to appreciate all of His creation, so I think it’s fine if we enjoy the Easter eggstras—so long as we don’t forget the main reason for all the joy and celebration. “He has risen, just as he said” (Matthew 28:6). That’s what we acknowledge on Easter, and as we embrace the truth that Jesus came to close the gap between us and God that we might have eternal life, we have more than enough reason to celebrate Easter—with all its eggstras.

A Burst of Springtime!

March 14, 2019 by Nancy 14 Comments

As we dig out from a blizzard here in Colorado I’m longing for the early signs of Spring I remember as a child. Each year in late February or early March my dad would come into the kitchen of our Tennessee home carrying long branches he had cut off the forsythia bush in our side yard. To my sisters and me the branches looked just as lifeless as all the others on the trees and bushes outside, but Dad placed them in a vase of warm water on the windowsill.

The next day, we would marvel at the tiny buds beginning to appear. Within three days the branches would be alive with radiant yellow flowers! Although it might still be gray and gloomy outside, we had a burst of sunshine in our kitchen window, and a promise that Spring was on the way.

How can we bring that kind of springtime into the hearts and lives of people we know? We can do it literally, by forcing bulbs and delivering a basket of blooming tulips or hyacinths to a friend having a long winter of the soul. Or by planning a visit to a botanic garden where she can breathe in the sights and smells of a green spring long before it’s in full bloom in her neighborhood.

We can also bring springtime feelings into the souls of others, especially older adults, by helping them remember times in their childhood that were carefree and happy, or by listening patiently as they share fond memories of loved ones lost and days gone by.

Or maybe it’s the more permanent message of springtime renewal that we hope to deliver, one that will have long-lasting, even eternal effects. Martin Luther wrote, “Our Lord has written the promise of the Resurrection not in books alone, but in every leaf of springtime.”

Let the crocuses pushing their way through the late snows, followed by the tulips standing tall and the trees covered in bright green leaves, be the signs we need to remind us that Easter is coming! Easter, the day where believers everywhere celebrate the truth of John 3:16: “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.”

So if, like the yellow forsythia, you deliver a burst of springtime to someone this year, consider adding a message of eternal hope. Remind them that Easter is coming! It could be just the encouragement they need.

Meet “Alter Girl”

February 22, 2019 by Nancy 12 Comments

I’m so pleased to have friend and author Andrea Syverson as a guest blogger on my site today! Enjoy this article first published by Group Publishing, Inc. If you haven’t read Andrea’s book yet, I think you’d love it. Or if you know someone who could benefit from her spiritual journey, feel free to share this.

A couple years ago, Marie Kondo captivated me with The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up.

Filled with adventure, decluttering, and searches for what “sparks joy,” her message of simplifying resonated with me, though not for the reason you might think. Like her many readers, I’d gone through my own adventure of simplifying…only I hadn’t simplified my home or my schedule. I’d simplified my faith. The process so profoundly altered me that I wrote about my journey in Alter Girl: Walking Away From Religion Into the Heart of Faith.

I actually didn’t realize at first that my faith needed simplifying. My East Coast Catholic upbringing was a strong and good one. Throughout the years, I wore several colors of plaid uniforms, went to Mass every Sunday and on Holy Days of Obligation, prayed the rosary, novenas and Stations of the Cross. I was happily devout and loved mingling with other like-minded happily devout Catholics.

In fact, I was so busy being religious, I forgot why I did all those things to begin with. It wasn’t until I moved out West and started dating a nondenominational Protestant that I gave it serious thought. Early in our relationship, Dean would ask me simple questions like, “Why do you do that?” I was challenged and rather offended. I’d never fielded questions like that, and my answers ranged from “because” to “that’s our tradition” to an exasperated “I don’t know!” After 18+ years of being a nearly straight-A Catholic student, I seemed to be failing the test.

Perhaps I did need to reexamine my practices. Perhaps in Marie Kondo-style I needed to take out all my religious stuff and review “what truly sparks joy?” What habits were I doing just because, and which ones genuinely touched my heart? Aided by these questions, I reevaluated and decluttered all the religious frippery until eventually my faith became simple, straightforward and personal. It all came down to a deep abiding friendship with Jesus. He is the Main Thing.

In Alter Girl, I share the full, messy details of this decluttering process in hopes of inviting others to do the same. If your faith has evolved from the traditions of your childhood, or if you’ve experienced a time of spiritual questioning, you’ll relate to my journey of undoing and redoing.

And if you’re reading this right now and the idea of simplifying your faith touches a chord, I encourage you to engage in a little decluttering yourself. Seek the practices that truly touch your heart and pull you into a deeper friendship with Jesus. Then freely release all the rest.

Andrea Syverson grew up a happily devout Catholic. After decades of plaid uniforms and even earning an MBA from a Catholic university, her life took an unexpected turn when she fell in love with a Protestant. You can read about her surprising spiritual journey in her Alter Girl: Walking Away From Religion Into the Heart of Faith.

That’s Love

February 13, 2019 by Nancy 18 Comments

Valentines, chocolates, red roses in a lovely vase—all these things say “I love you” on Valentine’s Day. But there’s more to love, isn’t there? I guess I’ve been tuned in to the variety of ways love is expressed since the years when I was single and didn’t have a special valentine. How is love expressed in the world? Let me count the ways.

A little two-year-old stops playing with her tea set and races to the door when the doorbell rings because she knows it might be her mom coming to get her. That’s love.

The blind man said, “Rabbi, I want to see.” “Go,” said Jesus, “your faith has healed you (Mark 10:51-52).” That’s love.

A badly injured dog struggles to walk across the room at the veterinary clinic where she is fighting for her life to lay her head on the shoulder of her worried owner. That’s love.

Then Jesus said to him, “Get up! Pick up your mat and walk (John 5:8).” That’s love.

Two women who normally attend an assisted living Bible study are conspicuously absent. The leader learns one of the women isn’t feeling well and the other wants to sit with her. That’s love.

“I am the good shepherd. The good shepherd lays down his life for the sheep (John 10:11).” That’s love.

A brand new mom gazes amazed into the eyes of her newborn son during the “getting to know you” stage of their lifelong relationship. That’s love.

“I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners (Mark 2:17).” That’s love.

A homeless man divides a roll he was given with hands wearing holey mittens and gives half to his homeless friend next to him. That’s love.

“For God did not send his son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him (John 3:17).” That’s love.

A woman with a houseful of kids to feed takes the time to make some soup for the elderly neighbor next door who is ailing. That’s love.

Jesus said to the woman, “Your faith has saved you; go in peace (Luke 7:50).” That’s love.

A husband visits his wife in a care facility every day even though she no longer remembers him or their 60-year marriage. That’s love.

Jesus straightened up and asked her, “Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?” “No one, sir,” she said. “Then neither do I condemn you,” Jesus declared. “Go now and leave your life of sin (John 8:10-11).” That’s love.

A woman who recently lost her husband comes home to find that her family has beautifully decorated her home and yard for the Christmas season. That’s love.

“For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life (John 3:16).” That’s love.

A weary mom volunteers for extra carpool duty because she knows her friend is going through a hard time. That’s love.

In 1 John 4:19 we read, We love because he first loved us. That’s the kind of love we can see in our world when we look for it—the kind of love worth celebrating on Valentine’s Day and every day.

All Er Nuthin’

January 18, 2019 by Nancy 16 Comments

When Will Parker courts Ado Annie in the musical “Oklahoma!,” he wants to make sure she’s stopped fantasizing about a traveling peddler and is ready to be all in with him. The flirtatious back-and-forth in the song is great fun, and the chorus lingers long after you leave the theater. “With me it’s all er nuthin’. Is it all er nuthin’ with you?” Will sings.

Well, I’m all in with my husband and our thirty-year marriage. No question there. But Will’s question seems to apply to the rest of my life. I’ve discovered in my 71 years that either I’m disciplined in my eating, my exercise, my work and my spiritual life, or I’m not disciplined in any area at all. With me it’s all er nuthin’.

It’s the New Year. I don’t do resolutions, but I do have goals. Resolutions seem too daunting; goals seem more manageable because they can be broken down into bite-sized bits. And since we’ve mentioned bite-sized, let’s go ahead and discuss the bane of most women over 40—the diet! I was such a skinny little girl I was always being dragged to the doctor to make sure I wasn’t anemic, sick, or disappearing. That all changed when I turned 40, my first time to go to Weight Watchers, and became a very distant memory after 50. All I want to know is, how old do you have to be before you get to be a wizened old lady?

Anyone remember the grapefruit diet in the ‘80s? How about the cabbage soup diet? Evidently women today are just as gullible as we were back then, because there is no shortage of fad diets, “magic” weight loss pills, and eating plans on the market. Each time one disappoints, I hear my mom saying, “Moderation in all things.” (That works for me as long as I’m less than moderate with carbs.) No matter what the covers of magazines promise, the only solution is to eat less and move more. Find an eating plan that works for you and stick to it. Don’t be tempted to try whatever works for others! (Studies show Weight Watchers is still the safest, healthiest, most effective plan overall.)

So that’s handled. How about the “move more” advice? The key is to find something you really enjoy—and DO it! I can’t imagine how ginormous I would be if I stopped exercising, but I’ve done many different things over the years. I jogged three miles every morning until I decided I’d rather finish life with my own knees, so I started walking instead and still love to walk. For many years I also went to Curves, a fitness circuit with resistance training. Then I developed a heel problem and was surprised to learn how much I loved substituting swimming laps for anything load bearing.

Now? I’m a full-fledged Zumba grandma! Every time I leave a Zumba class at the Y I feel like a dancer. I’m exercised all over, and the music has put me in a better mood than I was in when I arrived. But to get that feeling, I have to GO, right? Simple. But it means saying no to lunch with friends on those days. Bummer? Not when you focus on the results.

And then there’s work. I haven’t had a dedicated writing schedule since my last book came out almost three years ago—and we moved at the same time. But now I have, wait for it, actual assignments! I know what to do, I just have to do it. I have to set mini-deadlines for myself that I hold so seriously that I tell myself that if I miss a deadline a vicious bear will come through my office window and eat me. Or my cat. Either way, I can’t miss a deadline. All er nuthin’.

And finally, spiritual discipline. I won’t be able to stick to any of the above if I ever abandon my morning quiet time with the Lord. That’s the one thing that has held steady through all the wishy-washiness of the last few years. (See the blog “Molly the Quiet Time Cat” on my website from years ago. Even she knew I needed this!) The Christian life is a life of full surrender. What follows turning your life over to the Lord? Grace, mercy, peace, and the blessings that flow from obedience. “I surrender all,” the old hymn says. Once we do, the power of the Holy Spirit gives us the strength to be disciplined in all areas of our lives if we will only tap into it. Then we can live with purpose, and reap the benefits for ourselves and others.

This blog post is a pep talk to myself for 2019. But what about you? “With me it’s all er nuthin’. Is it all er nuthin’ with you?”

Keep the Joy

December 29, 2018 by Nancy 19 Comments

The post-holiday blues always seem to get me the day after Christmas. Obviously this isn’t a new problem, because this year I decided to search for some quick cures for these temporary blues on my computer—and what popped up was a newspaper column I wrote twenty years ago! What was my own advice to myself? Count your blessings. So I did, and I felt better immediately.

Both of the churches we regularly attend (long story) focused on the gift of joy this Christmas season, with the JOY candle shining brightly in their advent wreathes. In my son Tim’s church, the whole advent theme was Time for Joy, and they even had a red tractor in the entryway of the church to represent the fact that abiding joy in Christ can be cultivated through all of life’s seasons.

First Presbyterian Church, Colorado Springs, CO.

That’s another great cure for the post-holiday blues, remembering that joy isn’t only a gift at Christmas time, but can be ours all year long when we know where to search for it.

Chuck Swindoll knows. He had this to say about post-holiday blues in his book Come Before Winter: “When the wrappings and ribbons are in the trash, the manger scene is back in the attic, the friends and family have said good-bye, and the house feels empty and so do you—there is One who waits to fill your heart and renew your hope.”

The same One will restore your joy, and those who may have had much more than temporary blues throughout this Christmas season could need restoration. Even if we are in a good place emotionally, physically, and spiritually when the holiday season rolls around, we can still find it challenging. The busier schedule, the memories of people we have lost, the nostalgia, the unreasonable expectations, can all take a toll on our peace of mind and well-being. When someone is actively grieving the loss of someone they loved, or life has delivered a significant blow of any kind, it can be especially difficult to get through the holiday season feeling joy-filled.

So we all have to hold fast to whatever joy we can muster—and remember that it can be ours every day of the new year, not just when we are singing “Joy to the World.” We need to “repeat the sounding joy.” We need to seek it out and hold fast to it. And whenever we find we are running low on joy, we need to turn to the Lord and ask Him to fill us up from His infinite supply. (Nehemiah 8:10–“For the joy of the Lord is your strength.”)

Don’t pack away your joy with the Christmas decorations. Keep the joy. When necessary, seek the joy. And have a wonderful New Year!