Back Porch Break

Puppy Tales

January 25, 2017 by Nancy 21 Comments

My guest blogger today is Finnegan, a 4-month old Australian Shepherd and Golden Retriever mix.

F-I-Double N-E, G-A-N spells Finnegan. That’s the name my family gave me when they rescued me from the adoption fair at Wag-n-Wash. My middle name is Tails because the adoption lady couldn’t decide which of two families to give me to so she flipped a coin. My human brother Liam called out “tails” and tails it was, so I got to go home with him and his family. I’m sure the other family was nice, too, but I’m very happy to be Finnegan Tails McConnell.

One of my favorite things to do is go on a walk. Someone named Grancy stayed with me and my human brothers while my human parents were away recently. When we went on walks she said I was a connoisseur of all of God’s creation. I don’t know what that means, I just know there is so much to sniff in this world!

My favorite things to put in my mouth are sticks and rocks, but everyone makes me drop the rocks. Sometimes I see a plane in the air, a magpie in the scrub oak, or a bunny crossing the road very fast. I’m fascinated by all these things and easily distracted by anything that moves or makes noise. I’m also very interested in the deer that come into our yard, but even better is the poop they leave behind! Deer poop is the most fascinating substance there is, but no one in my family will let me eat it for some reason.

I spend a lot of time in my crate where I can sleep or watch everything that goes on in my new household. When I’m out I get to play around the house with cool toys and my favorite thing: a plastic bottle. It’s amazing how easy it is to chew up a toy, however. They just don’t seem made to last. Grancy got me a Scooby-Do to play with and the stuffing is already coming out of it. Not sure how that happened!

I like to help around the house when I can. Once when Grancy was folding laundry, I grabbed a pair of underwear out of the laundry basket. Then I raced all around with it as fast as I could go! Eventually Grancy caught me and made me give the underwear back. I have to say she moves pretty well for a woman her age!

My day is made up of crate time, play time, walks, many potty breaks, and of course–meal time. I get fed twice a day and I never miss a meal. One of my favorite times of day is when I go to meet the school bus. I get so excited when I see my human brothers Peter and Liam get off the bus, and then we run up the hill to our house together. They play with me and try to train me to do things before it’s time for my afternoon nap. My other human brother, Jack, is good about taking me out for potty breaks late at night and sometimes takes me to visit his friends. Everyone says I’m something called a “chick magnet,” so maybe that’s why. I know my human sister, Ellie, thought I was pretty cute when she was home from college.

Well, that’s pretty much the story of my life so far. Finnegan, that’s me!

Mary, Did You Know?

December 19, 2016 by Nancy 9 Comments

"Kissing the Face of God" by Morgan Weistling — “Kissing the Face of God” by Morgan Weistling

“Mary, Did You Know?” is my husband’s very favorite Christmas song, and I love it, too. It was written in 1991 by Mark Lowry, with music by Buddy Greene, when both were part of the Gaither Vocal Band. Since then it has been recorded and performed beautifully by many artists.

One reason it captures us so is that it takes us right back to the moment described in Luke 1 when Gabriel appeared to Mary to tell her, “Mary, you have found favor with God. You will be with child and give birth to a son, and you are to give him the name Jesus. He will be great and will be called the Son of the Most High. The Lord God will give him the throne of his father David, and he will reign over the house of Jacob forever; his kingdom will never end” (Luke 1:30-33).

The lyrics in the song go on to outline all the things Mary couldn’t possibly have known as a teenager in Nazareth, surprised and frightened by the appearance of God’s messenger. Things she couldn’t even know as she held her newborn son after he was born: That He would one day walk on water, save our sons and daughters, give sight to a blind man, calm the storm with His hand…that He was, in fact, the great I Am! Perhaps the most touching line in the song is, “When you kiss your little baby, you’ll kiss the face of God.”

No, Mary couldn’t possibly know all the joys and sorrows that this assignment from God would bring her. But she knew God, and she trusted Him. After asking just one quite reasonable question, “How will this be…since I am a virgin?” (Luke 1:34), Mary submitted herself completely to God’s will for her life. “I am the Lord’s servant,” Mary answered. “May it be to me as you have said” (Luke 1:38).

Mary was called blessed among women. Yes, there was great heartache, but Mary’s assignment brought her many blessings as well. Is there an area of your life where you are struggling with something God is asking of you? Trust and submit to His will. The blessings will follow.

First published by Fellowship of the Rockies, Christmas 2016.

Lifting Our Eyes

December 6, 2016 by Nancy 15 Comments

Have you noticed that we have become a society of people looking down? And we’re not looking down at beloved small children or pets as much as we are looking down at smartphones. Looking down to check Facebook, email, Twitter, Instagram or our GPS.

Technology can be helpful and crucial, no doubt about it. But looking down all the time can not only give us a neck ache, it can even be hazardous. Who can forget the YouTube video of the woman falling into the fountain at the mall while looking down at her smartphone? And no telling how many shoppers this season will be bumped into or knocked down by another shopper walking while looking at his or her phone.

What if we all spend more time looking up this Advent season, and less time looking down? What if we shift our gaze to the angel on top of the Christmas tree, the stars that shone over Bethlehem fields, or snow-crested peaks like those of the majestic mountains all around us here in Colorado? Do we really want to miss all that glory because we are looking down?

The Psalms of Ascent in the Bible give us examples of God’s people looking up instead of down as they sought Him with all their hearts. I lift up my eyes to the hills—where does my help come from? says Psalm 121:1. I lift up my eyes to you, to you whose throne is in heaven, reads Psalm 123:1.

If ever there was a time for us to lift both our eyes and our hands in praise to our Lord and Savior, it’s at Christmas time. And the Lord is happy to help us do that. But you are a shield around me, O Lord; you bestow glory on me and lift up my head, we read in Psalm 3:3

Once we are looking up again, we can share a smile with a harried store clerk. We can notice when someone needs help getting through the door or into her car. We can enjoy the birds at the feeder, the deer in the fields, sunrises, and sunsets as all heaven and nature sing. Don’t those sound like wonderful reasons to lift our eyes this Christmas?

First published by Fellowship of the Rockies, Christmas 2014.

Feeling Grape-ful

November 17, 2016 by Nancy 16 Comments

Even when grapes aren’t on my grocery list it seems I always come home from the store with some. I can’t resist those beautiful green or red orbs, now usually packaged in easy-to-grab cellophane bags.

And is there any other fruit more…well, fruitful? Grapes are not only a delicious, nutritious snack for school kids and dieters, they are used to make jam, jelly, juice, raisins, vinegar, grape seed oil and, of course—wine! In fact, 71% of all grapes grown are used to make wine, and the United States is fifth in in the world in grape production, behind Spain, France, Italy and Turkey. (If you somehow missed seeing the episode of “I Love Lucy” where Lucy visits a winery in Italy and learns to stomp grapes, find it on YouTube. It’s always good for a laugh!)

In this season of nostalgia and gratitude, however, I’ve discovered yet another purpose for grapes. No doubt you, like me, have friends and acquaintances going through difficult times this season—or maybe the person suffering is you. Two people I know have recently been diagnosed with breast cancer. A wonderful couple in our community lost a son to addiction in spite of every effort to save him. Natural and manmade disasters fill evening news reports and newspapers.

In light of all this, I want to be more aware of the blessings I have been given—and to focus anew not on what I don’t have, but on what I do. This is where the grapes come in. While sitting quietly with a small bowl of grapes next to my favorite reading chair, I decided to let each grape I plucked from the bunch represent a blessing that came my way this year. Taste and see that the Lord is good…we read in Psalm 34:8. Oh how His goodness became apparent to me as I acknowledged one blessing after another…all while enjoying the fruit of the vine.

On every bunch of grapes there will be a few vacant stems. Maybe a bird ate that grape or it was sorted out of the bunch for some reason. I let the empty stems represent blessings that didn’t come my way, but went to someone else instead. Maybe to one of the people that I know is hurting. And so I was even grateful for the missing grapes.

Grapes nourish us, but then so does gratitude. It’s said a grateful heart is in itself a prayer. I hope you can join me in being grape-ful this season. Taste and see!

This blog post first appeared as a column in The Country Register, Nov-Dec 2016.

Happy Halloween?

October 30, 2016 by Nancy 14 Comments

I’m a happy Halloweener, meaning I’m okay with the fun, wholesome aspects of the holiday. I love seeing a little girl (or several) dressed as Elsa from “Frozen” and all the Batman and Superman imitators. I love the smiles on children’s faces when you guess who they are pretending to be—and I understand that it’s fun to be someone you aren’t for a couple of hours. It’s also fun to come home with a bag of candy—especially the chocolate morsels!

Otherwise, I really don’t care for Halloween.

The basis for my dislike is that evil gets plenty of publicity on the nightly news without our dedicating a holiday to it. The world seems to get scarier by the minute, and it seems no excuse is necessary for people to behave horribly and terrorize others. So no, I don’t like the creepy, spooky, demonic aspects of this holiday.

Yes, I know it has deep-seeded roots, all the way back to a Celtic festival. And I know it was once known as All Hallows Eve, the night before the religious observance of All Saints Day, a reverent remembrance of the dead and the saints who have gone before us. And who doesn’t applaud the optimism of Charlie Brown waiting for the Giant Pumpkin to arrive?

However, the reverence is mostly gone, the Giant Pumpkin hasn’t shown up, and it says something about our society that Halloween is now the second largest revenue producing holiday—just barely behind Christmas. How must that make Thanksgiving and Valentine’s Day feel? Gratitude and love aren’t as important as jack-o-lanterns, spider webs, and haunted houses?

So I wish my readers a HAPPY Halloween. No witches, walking dead people, zombies, chainsaw murderers and the like. No maligning or torturing of black cats. Just a chance to build community by giving some safely packaged candy to your neighbor kids and by connecting with their parents in a positive way. And finally, a feeling of relief when you turn out the lights and head to bed to rest up for the next holiday that might scare the socks off you. Election Day!

HAPPY Halloween!

Life on the Cusp

October 19, 2016 by Nancy 16 Comments

The leaves are falling and swirling across the lawns and streets, gathering in gutters and along curbs. It won’t be long before the snowflakes are falling instead, creating a restorative blanket of fresh, white snow to cover up all that’s dingy. We are on the cusp of a new season.

I’m familiar with life on the cusp. Cusp is defined as: a transitional point or time, as between two astrological signs. I was born on January 20—on the cusp between the astrological signs Capricorn and Aquarius. I take direction for my life from the Creator, not from the creation, so I don’t pay much attention to astrological forecasts. But if there’s some truth to the characteristics attributed to each sign in the zodiac that may explain why I sometimes feel like the organized and stable Capricorn and sometimes like the curious and creative Aquarian! I live life on the cusp.

We are also on the cusp of a new reality in the United States of America. With the presidential election less than a month away, emotions, fears, and speculations have never been higher. Dear friends and family members on opposite sides of the political spectrum, and possibly with vastly different world views, almost innately know to avoid one another in these tense, contentious days. When all’s said and done, we will still want the people we cherish to feel comfortable in our presence. Of that I’m sure.

Yet are we, as some say, on the cusp of the death or the rebirth of this great nation? Is our amazing experiment in democracy and freedom over, or will we remember what made us exceptional in the first place and choose to return to the values and beliefs which gave birth to liberty? Only time will tell, but of one thing I am completely confident. Whatever happens, God will still be sovereign. He will still hear His people when we cry out to Him. He will still lavish His love, mercy, and grace upon those willing to ask and to receive.

As I think about living life on the cusp, I’m reminded of a portion of the Prayer of St. Patrick: Christ with me, Christ before me, Christ behind me, Christ in me, Christ beneath me, Christ above me, Christ on my right, Christ on my left…It’s this reality that allows me to live life on the cusp with eternal peace in my heart. I pray the same for you.

Pet Chronicles

August 29, 2016 by Nancy 20 Comments

How we love our pets. I don’t know if it was the expression on my face or the tears welling up in my eyes that tipped off the total stranger sitting in the waiting room with her dog. I just know that as I was leaving the vet’s office after dropping off my cat Beau for surgery, she leaped up to give me a hug, and soon I was crying on her shoulder sobbing, “It’s just so hard to leave him here.”

Beau had a gross looking sore on one of his hind feet. The vet wisely decided the best plan of action was to amputate his toe and send the whole mess to the lab for evaluation. The test came back positive for a low grade cancer, so taking the toe was the right decision and gives him a good chance at survival. Still, as I dropped him off that morning you would have thought I was the one having an amputation.

My concern for Beau started me thinking about all the pets I have loved in my lifetime. I remember each one so clearly because each one still occupies a place in my heart. You, too?

The first dog I can remember was a brown and white spotted, mid-sized mutt named Sally. She had the brightest brown eyes, the pinkest tongue, and the curliest tail you’ll ever see—and I loved her so much. Sally was just one more of the playmates my sisters and I had when we played hopscotch or jumped rope. She was always with us and always up for a romp. Over the years we also had a collie named Prince, a cocker named Prissy, and a cat named Cocomo. How I remember each one.

As a newlywed in the sixties my first “baby” was a miniature dachshund named Sebastian. This is the dog I dressed up in baby clothes while awaiting the birth of my first son because he weighed seven pounds and I thought I could practice on him! He’s also the dog that was so jealous once the baby came that he lifted his leg all around the bottom of the changing-table skirt I had painstakingly made. In so many ways Sebastian was just too smart to be a dog, but he was funny and affectionate and my heart still leaps whenever I see a mini-dachshund.

Two more dogs followed. Gorgeous light golden retrievers named Lady and Lad. Lad was Lady’s puppy. She gave birth to 11 puppies, but I was on the phone with the vet after 10 had been born and he told me to bring her in for a check-up. I called her and she obeyed, dropping puppy number eleven out on his head.

I have a feeling that was Lad, because as one vet said, “He’s about as bright as a billiard ball!” Lady was brighter, however, and both dogs were loyal and lovable. They were my jogging partners during a difficult time in my life. After Lady and Lad, I haven’t had the heart to get another dog. The holes they left just seem too large to fill.

Naively, I thought cats might be less of an emotional investment. Wrong. My son Tim convinced me to adopt a calico cat we named Callie. Next we adopted two kittens I named Kate and Allie after my favorite TV sitcom at the time. After a trip to the vet, we had to change Allie’s name to Al because she was a he! When Kate escaped one night and didn’t make it home, she was replaced by Betsy—a calico barn cat whose meow was stuck in her throat. We had Al and Betsy for 14 years and losing them was heartbreaking.

So it took almost a year before we adopted Molly, a sweet grayish cat we’ve had for 12 years now. I read an article that said a single cat might become depressed, so a few months later we adopted Beau. That’s when Molly really became depressed! Unlike Al and Betsy who curled up together daily, these two cats barely tolerate one another, but both are wonderful companions.

I think we grieve the loss of our pets so deeply when they go because they are so much a part of our daily lives. They need us, and we need them. In fact, I can’t imagine my life without a clever, comforting, entertaining cat in it. One adage reads, “Every life has nine cats.” Husband beware. It looks like I’m only up to seven. Two more to go to secure my crazy cat lady status!

I give myself permission to love my pets as I do because they, too, are God’s creatures given to us to care for and enjoy. Psalm 36:6 says, O Lord, you preserve both man and beast. Psalm 150:6 reads, Let everything that has breath praise the Lord. Our pets have breath. Dare we believe they also have souls and will greet us in heaven? Theologians may disagree, but I’ll just wait and see. Meanwhile, I’ll just love on the two I have. Or do they have me?

In the Company of Goats

July 18, 2016 by Nancy 10 Comments

I can’t think of a more exhilarating way to spend a warm summer’s day than in the company of goats. Until recently my only experience with a goat was as a child. For a while my family had a goat we unimaginatively named Billy. I think he was on loan from a larger farm as my father liked to expose my sisters and me to different animals. We thought Billy was entertaining and fun, but after he ate 12 blooms off my mother’s prized geranium plant, he was sent packing!

Recently I met many more goats when I took “The Goat Cheese Making Class” from The Goat Cheese Lady, Lindsey Aparicio, at her family’s farm in Penrose, CO (www.thegoatcheeselady.com). Not only did my three friends and I learn how to make three varieties of goat cheese, we used the milk we had milked from the goats that morning! We also learned all about the goats and the workings of the farm, then enjoyed a wonderful brunch that included the bread and goat cheese we made ourselves, the eggs we collected from the hens, and a fresh green salad. Gourmet chefs eat your hearts out. This simple, homemade repast was one of the best meals any of us ever had!

Memories of the day are all sprinkled with sun, laughter, and the gentle bleatings of goats of all sizes. Did I mention we got to help herd a bunch of young goats from their pen to an open pasture? Hilarious. Driving home I realized there is much to be learned by spending a day in the company of goats.

First, be willing to greet people you don’t know yet. The gentle calls of the goats when we first got out of our car began the relationships that became much more intimate when we learned to coax milk from their udders. I won’t say we became bosom buddies, but we sure got closer!

Second, know who to trust and then trust completely. When we were milking the goats, Lindsey cautiously held their back legs because our hands were strange to them and they might react and step in the milk. But when Lindsey or her son André were milking the goats, they totally relaxed. They knew who to trust.

Third, remember that giving and receiving are intrinsically connected. As the female goats willingly gave their life-giving milk they got sweet feed to munch. They also enjoyed the relief that came from being milked, as any lactating mom will attest. Giving and receiving. Both are blessings.

And lastly, if a gate opens, run through it! My friends and I were a bit tired at the end of the day. After all, herding goats wasn’t a normal daily activity for any of us. But we were so glad we had leapt at the opportunity. Just like those darling and daring baby goats.

Defying Description

June 28, 2016 by Nancy 24 Comments

Me in junior high with my prize-winning rabbit, Queenie. — Me in junior high with Queenie, my prize-winning rabbit.

Every time I open up Facebook I’m asked to do something I don’t seem to be able to do. In an attempt to update my profile, Facebook asks me to: Describe Who You Are.

You may think that would be easy to do, but then maybe you haven’t lived over six decades like I have. What is it, exactly, that they expect me to say to describe me? What are they hoping I’ll include? What categories of knowledge or personality traits? What accomplishments or failures? What labels that I’ve collected over the years, like so many stickers on an old suitcase, would satisfy this request?

I could have answered it easily in elementary school. I might have written, “I’m a little girl in Tennessee who loves to play barefooted in the summer and to ride her horse, Dolly, bareback.”

I could have answered it in junior high: “I’m a basketball player and I raise rabbits and show them at the state fair.”

I could have answered it in senior high: “I’m a cheerleader and editor of the yearbook. I like boys!”

Then it gets more complicated. In my twenties I could have written: “I’m a college graduate with degrees in journalism and English education, and the stay-at-home mother of two little boys. I’m an Army wife.”

In my thirties it would change to: “I’m a divorced mother of two boys and fulltime writer for a large corporation.”

In my forties I could have reported: “I’m a happily remarried mother of two, stepmother of two, and corporate manager spending long hours at the office.”

In my fifties I might have said: “I’m a freelance writer and published author and my grandkids call me Grancy.”

But what about now? How do I succinctly describe who I am in my sixties, and who at Facebook cares anyway? Are they going to write me back and say: “That doesn’t sound like you.” Or maybe, “Be more specific please.” I doubt it.

And so I leave the request unsatisfied still. If I wrote anything to sum up my life to this point, it would have to be: “I am a redeemed child of God. A daughter of the most high King. I am blessed beyond belief, and I am eternally grateful.” I guess I can live with that description today and forever—whether I share it with Facebook or not.

What about you? Have you fulfilled this Facebook request? How did you describe YOU?

Graduations and Weddings, Oh My!

May 10, 2016 by Nancy 18 Comments

May and June are traditionally the months when families gather for graduations and weddings, and never has this been truer for our family than this year! We have four graduations and a wedding within just a few weeks. As the plans begin to come together I’m reminded once again of the similarities between these two celebrations.

When a large family is involved, both graduations and weddings can be a logistical challenge. Who can come and who can’t? Where will everyone stay? What transportation is needed and who can provide it? And then the always unanswerable, but ever-present question: will the weather cooperate? What’s the backup plan for outdoor ceremonies or celebrations?

There are 21 people in our immediate blended family. Three granddaughters are graduating from high school this year—and one granddaughter is graduating from college and getting married! As all the flight and hotel reservations are being made, the gifts selected, and the parties planned, I keep seeing the faces of these four dear honorees—not as they are now, as proud graduate or beaming bride—but as they were as toddlers and little girls.

I was privileged to go with my granddaughter Amanda to try on her wedding dress for the first time. Seated in the “salon” area of the bridal shop while the assistant helped her into her dress in the fitting room, I wondered if I would cry when I first saw her. I knew I was supposed to cry. I’d seen that in the movies and commercials again and again. But what if I didn’t? She’d be disappointed, wouldn’t she?

Then she stepped into the room looking absolutely radiant–with the same excited smile on her face that I remembered from when she was four and twirling around in her latest “play dress up” outfit in our living room. The tears naturally flowed.

So what do all these honorees have in common? A sense of accomplishment. A bit of apprehension as they move into an unknown future. And hopefully parents and grandparents searching for a tissue during “Pomp & Circumstance” or “Here Comes the Bride”–and trying to remember how to switch their smart phones from still photos to video.

If we can give our graduates, brides, and grooms anything this season, may it be the reassurance that plans may change, dreams may take a different shape, blessings may come in disguise, but love is forever. The love of parents, grandparents, siblings and starry-eyed new spouses. It’s the love that makes the celebrations worth having. It’s the love that makes the memories.