Back Porch Break & Take My Hand Again Blog Posts

The Cross at Easter

April 14, 2022 by Nancy 8 Comments

Carrying his own cross, he went out to the place of the Skull (which in Aramaic is called Golgotha).

Here they crucified him, and with him two others—one on each side and Jesus in the middle.

John 19:17-18

In a sense, the entire Christian life is a series of steps closer and closer to the Cross of Calvary—with each step an arrival. Only as we draw close in prayer and meditation to the truth of what Christ did for us by willingly dying on that cross can we realize the enormity of the gift God gave us. For many, that journey is a lifelong process.

We can see the love Christ displayed on the cross even from a distance, where we may have stood terrified and huddled together under some tree on that dark day of crucifixion. We see the love for His mother as He asked the Apostle John to care for her once He was gone. We see the love for the believing thief on the cross next to Him as He promised, “Today you will be with me in paradise” (Luke 23:43). We see His love for every man and woman created by His Father throughout history and beyond as He made the ultimate sacrifice for mankind. His sacrifice expressed His love for you and for me.

What do we see as we draw closer? That Jesus didn’t just pay the price for our sin, rather He took on all the sin of the world so that nobody anywhere would have to suffer eternal consequences for being less than perfect. When John the Baptist first saw Jesus on the shore of the Jordan River he said, “Look, the Lamb of God, who takes away the sin of the world!” (John 1:29). Believe. Come to the cross, and your sin, past, present and future, is gone. Not rationalized or sugar-coated in some way. Gone. As is the guilt of that sin. You are completely forgiven.

One step closer and we see the abject humility of the one who is both the Son of God and the Son of Man. We see His wounds and the blood flowing down.

He lowered Himself to the very pit of hell—separation from God—so that we might go higher than we could ever go on our own. And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself and became obedient to death—even death on a cross (Philippians 2:8).

The Bible promises that if we also humble ourselves in the eyes of the Lord, He will lift us up. Are you there at the foot of the cross? There’s no better time than this Easter to take that journey. Fall to your knees in humility and worship the One whose resurrection from the dead we celebrate on Easter Sunday. Accept His unconditional forgiveness. You are welcome at the foot of the cross.

Excerpted from The Hope of Glory, Volume Two, Lesson 56.

Vintage Volunteers

April 8, 2022 by Nancy 17 Comments

April is National Volunteer Month so I decided it was a good time to honor some volunteers I know.

Virginia scoots around in her wheelchair from table to table in the assisted living facility’s dining room. She volunteered to keep the holders for the sugar packets on each table refilled each day, and she takes her volunteer responsibilities seriously.

Lois comes to my The Hope of Glory class with her knitting in a tote. Each week she shows us the progress she’s making on the next cozy hat she’s knitting for a baby in the hospital. How grateful new parents must be to receive this handmade gift, and even if Lois never gets to see their delighted faces or see the hat on a tiny head, she keeps knitting. She also regularly reads to fellow residents with vision problems, including Joanne.

Joanne always assumed that she would spend her golden years tutoring students and reading to others, but macular degeneration derailed her plans. “I asked the Lord what He would have me do instead,” she explained to our group, “and He told me to pray for the younger generation because they need to be lifted up in prayer. So now that’s my volunteer assignment.”

And my friend Phyllis, 93, has volunteered at a thrift shop that supports community philanthropies for almost 30 years.

It’s a privilege to know older adults who still have the heart to volunteer at a time in their lives when they could so easily sit back and say, “Been there, done that. It’s someone else’s turn to volunteer now.” Rather than be complacent, they see a need and rise up to meet it. They say like Isaiah in Isaiah 6:8, “Here am I. Send me!” I call them vintage volunteers.

Recently I was asked to address a group of volunteers at the Ronald McDonald House of Southern Colorado, and I identified what all volunteers need to succeed: passion, commitment, and hope.

Our passion may be whatever makes us extremely happy or extremely angry. Whatever consumes our thoughts and inspires us to sign up or write a check. Once we identify a passion for some cause, we are more likely to volunteer.

And every volunteer needs commitment. It’s commitment that makes us show up for our volunteer shift even when it would be easier to call and cancel. And it’s commitment that moves us to complete any task we see that needs doing, even if it’s not in our volunteer job description.

Without hope, we wouldn’t volunteer at all, would we? We volunteer our time and resources because we hope our involvement will make a difference. And we hope because we care.

If you have elders in your life with time on their hands, help them recall a passion that motivated them in the past. If possible, identify some task, however small, that they can do to feed that passion. Encourage them to be committed to this volunteer effort and instill them with hope that what they do will make a difference. Vintage volunteers have so much to offer, and volunteering in any way adds purpose to their days.

First published in Pikes Peak Senior News.

MORE Hope of Glory!

March 24, 2022 by Nancy 22 Comments

I’m excited to announce to my blog subscribers first that Volume Two of The Hope of Glory, A Devotional Guide for Older Adults, is set to release on March 29 from Ironstream Media. Most books have a back story, and this book’s story goes back a long way.

When I was finishing up The Hope of Glory, Volume One, in 2013 for a 2014 release date, I was dismayed to discover that I had two lessons in the book on the theme of grace. You may know that each of the 57 lessons in the book (one a week plus five for special holidays) was written to be used in a class of residents at an assisted living facility. Since I wrote a new lesson prior to my class each week, it wasn’t until I was compiling the final manuscript that I discovered the duplication. Not only did I need to come up with one more lesson, I didn’t know what I would do with the extra “grace!”

“That’s OK,” I heard the Lord reassure me. “You can use it in Volume Two.”

“Volume Two!” I exclaimed. “Give me a break. I don’t even have this volume off to the publisher and You’re telling me I’m going to be writing Volume Two?” Yep. That was the message.

Since I was in the habit of writing one lesson a week I just kept going and soon had fifteen lessons written for the second book. (Plus the new one I had to write for Volume One of course!) But then I felt led in a different direction.

During the time my mom and my mom-in-law spent in assisted living we learned a great deal about what to do and what not to do to help them navigate this new and sometimes scary season of life. After they passed away, I was left with knowledge I no longer needed. Yet I kept running in to friends who were currently facing how to care for aging parents, and I knew there were many more Baby Boomers sailing in to these uncharted waters daily. I collected research, interviewed caregivers, recorded our memories, and the result was the book Take My Hand Again, A Faith-based Guide for Helping Aging Parents, published by Kregel Publications in 2015.

After all the new book excitement died down (Oprah never did call), I knew I needed to get back to writing weekly lessons for The Hope of Glory but a bit of laziness set in. On weeks that I had the time and felt the inspiration, I would write a new lesson. Other weeks it was just easier to pick up my well-worn copy of The Hope of Glory and use one of those lessons. Besides, I was volunteering at a different facility then so they were all new to those folks!

Fast forward to the pandemic lock-down of 2020—two years ago this month. Out of excuses and still feeling the nudging of the Holy Spirit to finish what was started so long ago, I set up a dedicated writing schedule and completed the manuscript. But then I had to run the publishing gauntlet once again. The wonderful agent I had for Take My Hand Again had retired, and the publisher of The Hope of Glory, Volume One, was purchased by another publisher. Believing in the Divine Agent I still had, into the fray I went and finally received a contract from the new publisher, Ironstream Media, in March of 2021.

Many famous authors write two books a year, following successful formulas their readers have come to expect. I admire them, but I’m not them. Rather I’m grateful for, and content with, the assignments I’ve been given by God, and for the ability to bring them to completion in His way and in His time.

If you’d like to celebrate the launch of this latest joint venture with me, I’d love to have you on my Book Launch Team! All you have to do is agree to spread the word about The Hope of Glory to those who need it most: to anyone who is a senior, works with seniors, or cares for them. This could include at a care facility near you, at your church, on social media, in your small group Bible study, to a neighbor over the back fence, your hairdresser, etc. I’ll send out easy-to-share posts and quotes to the team. Just say, “I’m in!” in the comments section below. (Whether you’re willing to share a little or a lot!)

Let me know how you shared about the book during the month of April and I will enter your name in a drawing for a free book and a $50 gift card to COSAS Phoenix, my stepdaughter Julie’s wonderful collection of colorful imports supporting Mexican vendors. My cat, Annie, will draw the winning name on May 2!

Thank you for reading and for being the wind in my sails! I so appreciate those of you who encouraged me to complete the assignment God gave me. To God be the glory.

To Love and Be Loved

February 11, 2022 by Nancy 17 Comments

This time of year there is a lot of emphasis on love in our society, but too often the focus is on romantic love and little thought is given to other types of love. The love of parent and child, of grandparent and grandchild, or of one friend for another are all incredible forces of love worth celebrating. We can show our love to the seniors in our lives by reminding them that love is both timeless and ageless.

Jesus was the perfect model of how we are to love, and He asked us to love ourselves, love others, and love God.

First, love ourselves. In Mark 12:31, Jesus said, “Love your neighbor as yourself.” Yet because of messages they heard as a child, old wounds, failures, or even sin, older adults sometimes find it hard to love themselves. We need to remind them that we can all love ourselves because God first loved us. And He loves us unconditionally. He loves us so much that He sent Jesus to die for us so that we could dwell in His presence for eternity. He loves us enough to convict us of our sins and free us from even the guilt of them. He loves us enough to indwell us with the Holy Spirit to comfort and guide us. He loves us enough to give us people to love and to be loved by, and a Creation to enjoy. He stuffs our shoeboxes with valentines!

Second, we are to love others. In John 13:34, Jesus said, “A new command I give you: Love one another.” Some people are easier to love than others. But we are even to love the unlovable. It may be unrealistic to believe that we will be able to love everyone we encounter unconditionally, but it is realistic to believe that we can consider choosing love as our first response in every situation. What a difference that would make in the daily lives of those in care facilities. Tell them it’s possible.

Finally, we are to love God. In Matthew 22:37, Jesus said, “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.” He called this the first and greatest commandment. We love God when we worship Him and give Him praise. We love Him when we obey Him and trust Him with our past, present, and future. And we can do that at any age.

Let’s reach out to the seniors in our lives with the love that lasts—the kind of love worth celebrating today and every day. Happy Valentine’s Day!

First published in Pikes Peak Senior News, February/March 2021.

Fueled by Delight

January 31, 2022 by Nancy 25 Comments

A bonus sermon I heard over the holidays has me heading into the New Year fueled by delight. Pastor Aaron Stern spoke to a small congregation gathered in Pauline Chapel in Colorado Springs about the importance of spending time daily, quietly, in the presence of God. We’ve always known that it’s good for us, in fact delights us, to dedicate time seeking God through His word, through prayer, and through listening for Him to speak. (See The Quiet Time Cat.)

But Pastor Stern said something that resonated with me in a new way. He reminded us that it also delights God when we spend time with Him! So after our morning quiet time we can go into our day fueled not just by our delight in God, but by God’s delight in us. Wow.

A wonderful Bible promise is found in Psalm 37:4: Delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart. We find delight in Him. Yet one of my favorite Bible verses is Zephaniah 3:17: The Lord your God is with you, he is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, he will quiet you with his love, he will rejoice over you with singing. That’s how much He delights in us. A two-way relationship of delight is the gift that is ours for the asking.

Given all this, I choose DELIGHT as my word for 2022. With the Lord as my guide, I will pay attention to the ways I can seek Him and delight in Him. And I will try not to miss any opportunity to experience and receive His delight in me. In the past it’s been during the most menial acts of service that I felt God’s pleasure most. I want to look for opportunities to feel, and receive, His pleasure and delight more often.

I realize it may be hard to hold on to delight in 2022. Certainly it was in the two preceding years. Ongoing threats to freedom of speech and election integrity in our country pierced my patriot heart. A pandemic, concerning enough in its organic state, was manipulated in destructive ways and continues to be. And most heartbreaking of all was the loss of our grandson. (See Love Like Josh.)

So how can we move forward to all the unknowns of the year to come with delight? We look for the good, and yes, there will be some. We accept the peace that the Lord offers as He speaks to us through the moments of delight He gives, like the ones He gave me one memorable afternoon at the beach with two great grandsons. We delight ourselves in Him, and believe, with all our hearts, that He also delights in us. Have a delightful New Year.

Love Like Josh

January 12, 2022 by Nancy 53 Comments

I’m not sure I can write about this but it’s become clear that until I do, I won’t be able to write much of anything. Beyond heartbreaking to us was the loss of our grandson, Joshua James Beller, on September 4^th of last year. Josh was born with cerebral palsy and lived to be almost sixteen before he simply didn’t wake up on that sunny, fall morning. It seemed as if God said, “This boy’s had enough and I’m bringing him home.” While we rejoice that Josh is with Jesus and free of his earthly body, the shock and grief of losing him continues to be a part of each day.

It’s so true that grief and relief are close companions. Some days, at unexpected times, it just washes over me that Josh is missing from our family and the tears come. Other days relief springs up, reminding me that he doesn’t have to struggle with his inability to talk or walk anymore.

Joelle and Will at the grand reopening of Wolverine Wake Up

What helped our family so much was the amazing support of the community of Parker, CO. Josh was a sophomore at Chaparral High School there and part of an inspiring group of special needs students. The day before he passed away, he applied for and got a job at the school’s Wolverine Wake Up Coffee Bar. With the help of his language therapist, Josh was able to respond to the interview questions on his computerized “talker.” Since it could also be programmed so Josh could push a button to say, “Hi, I’m Josh, welcome to Wolverine Wake Up,” Josh got the job as greeter! By all reports he came home that day so proud and excited that he had a job.

Word spread rapidly through the school that Josh had passed away. The Significant Special Needs Class decided to wear green T-shirts, the color denoting cerebral palsy, the following Thursday. Soon the whole high school decided to wear green to their ballgames that week to honor Josh. Then one of Chap’s competing high schools, Legend, heard about Josh and they all wore green to their ballgames too!

When Josh’s mom, Joelle, and his older brother, Charlie, went over to the volleyball game that Thursday night, the Chap Superfans began chanting, “Love like Josh! Love like Josh!” and friends of Josh’s twin brother, Will, wore green T-shirts with “Love like Josh” printed on the back. Later more T-shirts and wrist bands saying “Love like Josh” were created and sold in Josh’s memory to raise funds for The Cerebral Palsy Foundation.

Beyond the school, neighbors offered housing to us, brought food, and openly shared their stories of how much Josh meant to them. He inspired all who knew him to be the best they could be because he worked so hard at being the best Josh he could be each and every day. As a friend wrote to us, “Josh developed the fruit of the Spirit in everyone in his family, and that is his legacy” (Galatians 5:22-23). Clearly, that’s so true.

Our favorite photo of Josh with Charlie, taken by Will in 2017

And of course, from the first moment until now, God has been ever present, offering comfort and hope in the midst of our despair. He gifted Joelle with a beautiful vision of Josh in heaven, standing behind a bright light and pointing down while saying, “Mom! This is Him! This is Jesus! He’s right here!” He continues to comfort us every moment of this journey with the peace of God which passeth all understanding (Philippians 4:7 KJV).

I know without a doubt that when I get to heaven a handsome young man is going to walk up to me and say, “Hi, Grancy,” and I’ll know it’s Josh. I’m saving my first dance for him.

We miss you and love you, Josh. And we will do our best to “Love like Josh” the rest of our days.

Bethlehem Bound

December 23, 2021 by Nancy 12 Comments

I haven’t been able to write lately, but I’m hoping for rejuvenation in the new year to introduce this new website and The Hope of Glory, Volume II, coming out in March! Meanwhile, here is a Back Porch Break Christmas Classic along with my sincere hope that you and yours have a blessed and Merry Christmas!

Let’s go to Bethlehem and see this thing that has happened…Luke 2:15

How often we look back on the way God orchestrated something in our lives, something so totally opposite from what we had planned, and say, “But, of course, it had to be just as it was.” Such was the case when Mary and Joseph traveled over rugged trails into Judea to the little town of Bethlehem. Certainly Mary didn’t expect to be having a baby so soon, and definitely not so far from home. But the journey fulfilled prophecy, for it is recorded in Micah 5:2: “But you, Bethlehem Ephrathah, though you are small among the clans of Judah, out of you will come for me one who will be ruler over Israel.”

Surely the shepherds didn’t expect to be visited by a heavenly host that starry night either–nor to travel to Bethlehem to worship a newborn King.

As Christmas comes this year, the question on our hearts needs to be “Where are you leading me, Lord? What plans do you have for me that I don’t even know about yet?” When we ask those questions sincerely, we can celebrate Christmas Bethlehem bound, ready to go where He leads and ready to humbly worship at the feet of our Lord.

My husband and I were privileged to travel to Israel in 1998 and Bethlehem was one of the stops along our way. We were somewhat surprised by what we found there—not the idyllic scene portrayed on greeting cards, but an enormous, ornate Greek Orthodox church, the Church of the Nativity, built over the spot where Jesus was said to have been born. Pilgrims to Bethlehem step down cavernous steps inside this church into a small enclosure made even closer by the many tapestries and incense-burning lamps hanging all around. In turn, each traveler gets down on hands and knees to peer into a grotto of sorts where a 14-pointed star is embedded in the floor to “mark the spot” where Jesus was born. Jewish tradition ensures this spot is accurate, but it’s now so different from what it once was—and from what we expected.

At another stop along our tour, we saw a typical manger from the time of Jesus’ birth. It was not a wooden structure filled with hay, but a chiseled stone watering trough. Thinking of these things now, I realize there’s no better time than Christmas to set aside all our preconceived ideas. Rather than celebrate just as we always have, let’s open our hearts to the plans the Lord has for us this Christmas. Like Mary and Joseph may we be, in heart and spirit, Bethlehem bound.

(Painting shown is “Adoration of the Shepherds” by Rembrandt.)

Make it Mine

October 12, 2021 by Nancy 25 Comments

This is my forty-fourth fall living in Colorado. Forty-four years of aspen gaspin’ drives and hikes through the golden glow of quaking aspen. Yet I have to say this year’s hike may be the most memorable. Once you hike a trail you can stake a claim to it! I’m glad I made this one mine.

Friends had clipped a description of the Vindicator Valley Trail from the Colorado Springs Gazette a while ago—one of the finds from adventure reporter Seth Boster. They invited us to join them so we set out on a partly overcast, breezy but nice fall day toward the historic mining town of Victor, Colorado.

The trail was easy to find just off County Road 81 and has been well maintained by the nonprofits that support it. As advertised, it not only provides gorgeous vistas of aspen, but also educational discoveries at every turn as hikers stop to read the historical markers and see the remains of gold mines that saw their glory days in the late 1800s.

The two-mile hike up hill and down at 10,200 feet in elevation did exercise my body, but it was my imagination that got the best workout. I had forgotten how many of the old mines were named for women, and I couldn’t help but wonder who these women were, and how they felt about having a gold mine named after them.

Was Theresa someone’s beloved wife, perhaps a mail order bride from back East who responded to an ad to marry a rich gold miner out West? Or did the miner who went into Victor to file his claim slap a piece of gold ore on the bar and tell the barmaid in her flouncy skirt and bustier (like Miss Kitty in Gunsmoke), “I just found me some gold, Theresa! And I’m naming the mine after you!” How would she have responded as she poured whiskey into the glass he held in his gritty hands? And did he expect something in return? Without doing a lot more research, I can only imagine.

Maybe Annie J. was the darling granddaughter of a mine supervisor. A little girl with golden curls who loved to visit the mine with her grandpa, her little hand in his, as he checked on the day’s yield. And what about Glorietta? Was she someone’s grandma known for her beans and biscuits, or a sister who died too young from consumption? Surely Lillie was a dance hall performer. Or not. I’d love to know.

At the end of the trail we were amused to find a sign with an oft used miner’s toast: “May you stand in ore and your labors be in vein.” And may you venture out on Vindicator Valley Trail yourself some golden aspen day. It’s a wonderful reminder of what’s still good about living in Colorado. You may want to include visits to nearby Victor and Cripple Creek, too. Make the golden adventure yours.

Planting with Purpose

June 10, 2021 by Nancy 13 Comments

Some years ago I decided there is a big difference between gardeners and yardeners. Gardeners plan ahead, perusing gardening catalogs all winter long. Yardeners step out in their front yards, cup of coffee in hand, gaze down at something green sprouting up and think, “Hmmm. I wonder what that is.”

The good news is that it’s not that hard to convert yourself from a yardener to a gardener. And whether you’re still waiting until the mood hits you to plant something, nurturing this season’s plantings, or already replacing failing plants, you can add some purpose to your efforts.

And yes, purpose requires planning. Of course, like me, you may be more likely to visit a nursery, buy something eye-catching, then go home and wonder where to plant it. Better to have a list, having thought out what plants work best in sunny spots versus shady areas or with lots of water versus next to none. And as tempting as it is to jump right into planting, experts say we must put in good soil or amend the soil we have.

Those super smart gardening people also advise having a color palette in mind for your flower garden and sticking to it, especially in smaller gardens. But don’t be afraid to think outside the flower box! Who knew purple and orange would look so good together, or even red and pink? It’s also good to take note of early versus late bloomers so you have some color in your garden all season.

Part of planting with purpose is deciding what wildlife or insects you would like for your garden to deter or attract. In this way the garden provides a purpose beyond being beautiful. For instance, if rabbits or deer have access to your garden, ask at the nursery for a list of plants that they don’t find quite as tasty as others. (Good luck!) You can even deter mosquitoes from gardens near an outdoor patio by planting citronella grass, basil, lemon balm, peppermint, lavender or catnip.

It’s a joy to see gardens that attract life, however, especially butterflies and hummingbirds. Monarch butterflies are sadly declining in number so planting milkweed for them is a good idea. Butterflies are also attracted to phlox, butterfly bush and coneflowers. Our hummingbird friends love any nectar-bearing red plant, but are also drawn to penstemon, lupine, salvia or cardinal flower. Bees need our support, too, and they thank us by pollinating! They love blue mist spirea, sage, or bee balm, and they won’t sting if left alone.

As with any creative enterprise, it’s okay to make mistakes, and gardens are so forgiving. Don’t hesitate to gently move plants that aren’t doing well to a different spot or (gasp!) throw them away and start over. Start small and you’ll soon discover you’ve given up yardening for gardening—and you’re planting with purpose. Enjoy!

A Letter to Mom

May 7, 2021 by Nancy 17 Comments

Letter writing is a dying art form in our society. What better time to resurrect it than Mother’s Day, when we can sit down and write a letter to our moms? If like mine your mother has passed on beyond the reach of the U.S. Postal Service, you can still write her a letter addressed to heaven and reap the benefits of feeling connected to her once again.

For most of my adult life I lived far away from my mother, either out of the country or on opposite sides of it. So Mom would faithfully write me letters telling me of all the everyday happenings in our hometown. She’d include an overview of the weather, how the garden was coming in, what my sisters and their families had been up to, any major improvements in the area—just any tidbit of news that would draw me closer to the place and people I loved and left. Almost always she would close with, “Well, I’d better finish up to beat the postman.”

I wrote her letters in reply, telling her news of the faraway places I lived and keeping her up to date on travel adventures and the “growing up” antics of my two sons. In short, we were pen pals as well as mother and daughter, and both of us were blessed by the letters that connected our lives and hearts.

It’s time to find some pretty stationery and write our moms again. But how can we make a letter to mom meaningful, whether she will read it or we’ll just deliver it in our hearts? One idea is to use the letters written by the Apostle Paul as our template.

Even though Paul sometimes wrote his letters from prison to churches he had visited, those in cities like Philippi, Corinth or Thessalonica eagerly awaited and shared the missives he sent. Why? Because Paul would most often begin with a warm greeting, add an expression of gratitude, offer a strong dose of encouragement (or admonition if needed), promote reconciliation and close with a message of hope.
Students of the Bible pour over the epistles of Paul for all the instruction on living the Christian life still relevant today. Though we may not want to include all of Paul’s elements in letters to our moms, they are a great place to start. For instance, we could say something like I thank my God every time I remember you (Philippians 1:3). We could remind her that we love her and that love always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres (1 Corinthians 13:7). Or bless her by closing like Paul often did: The grace of our Lord Jesus Christ be with you (1 Thessalonians 5:28).

Because of God’s love moving in us we should all be able to address our mothers warmly and with respect despite any lingering relationship issues, express our gratitude to them, share some happy memories, and encourage them to keep the faith. Such a letter will be a treasured gift for a mom still with you, or a joyful remembrance of a mom loved and lost.

(First published in Pikes Peak Senior News.)